Monday, January 5, 2009

... alienate a beer drinker.

What the FUCK? Somebody just took an American Icon off the shelf and smashed it on the ground in a million pieces. I just read that Anheuser Busch is no longer giving free samples of their beer at their theme parks, i.e Seaworld, Busch Gardens. It just goes to show you what those Belgium asses, no, what is more insulting? dinks? porkers? weenies? do. (For those of you who are uninformed, A.B. sold out to InBev, a Belgium company.) Keep selling out the United States, assholes. I actually wonder if the machines we vote on are made in the U.S. If you closed our borders now, how much could we sustain ourselves? I know Polartec is still made in the U.S., and most of New Balance sneakers, and Poland spring water, maybe Frito Lay. So I guess we could run warmly with nice snacks, but God help us. I'm pretty sure we couldn't get much other food. Has to be less than 1% toys.  Of course I blame the stockholders and family members for selling out Anheuser Busch as well. Like you needed that much more money. How bad could you have been doing?
I guess I am ranting. But we have only ourselves to blame. What a bunch of weenies we are.
The best part is that the new owners of A.B  have the theme park spokesman, Fred Jacobs, so wound up that he said, "the free samples had a narrow appeal among park customers." Drink more of the Koolaid Fred! Couldn't you have found another job and kept your balls intact. I'd rather be working the night shift at a 7-11 and be able to look my son in the eye than let out that load of bullshit. 
C'mon, who reading this, who has been to the parks can say they have seen the lines at the sample bar less than crowded. The first time I saw them I thought it was for a ride, and said, "they'd have to be giving out free beer to make me wait in a line like that!" When I found out it was...I got in line. For crissake the freaking line reminded me of the gas lines in the 70's or when thay had those stupid fads on Cabbage Patch Kids and Power Rangers. And this was like every day, not just Christmas time. My freaking mother enjoyed a free sample, and she doesn't live in a double wide or anything. 
I don't know what the world is coming to... free samples didn't appeal to the masses. Fred! Go into a Costco on a weekend. People rush the fucking lady at the cheesy crab puff table and get in fist fights... 
A chance to sample a great American Beer? Fucking Belgians. Didn't we save their asses in WWII as well? I should have asked the guy behind me in the Dunkin Donuts line. 

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